Monday, February 25, 2008

Have I failed or is it just a miss start?

Its been 16 days since my last blog and sadly the last 15 I haven't been juice feasting. But I plan to start again on March 1st this Friday to be part of the global juice feast.

I won't go into details why I failed because there was really no excuse but I pick myself up and dust myself off and declare a miss start. I am determined to do the 92 days of juice feasting.

There is a certain level of sadness I feel at letting myself down again. Same old pattern resurfacing. This time I told myself I was being too dramatic......I said to myself why can't you just be normal, not so extreme. Go to weight watches like normal people. But what is normal anyway.

This time I am set up even better. I realised last time that in the last couple of days I was only drinking about 3 to 31/2 litres of juice. This time I will do as David Rainoshek said and make the full 4 litres early so I am prepared.

I have also purchased a blood glucose monitor and will take my blood glucose a couple of times a day leading up to the juice feast to get an idea of how much greens I need to drink.

This is another reason to do it. Tonight I took my first blood glucose and it was 8.9 after dinner which is considered pre diabetic or maybe even diabetic. This is a bit of a shock considering I have always had very good low levels but it has been 1 year since my last check up and my health has definately gone down hill since then. After that result I felt like I wanted to start tomorrow but no, I must be fully prepared. When Friday comes around I will have everything I need to succeed....the rest is up to me.

My blood presure is 140/82 which is also up significantly since it was last checked a year ago. Resting pulse rate at 104 is also not crash hot. I will now use all of these tools to measure the success of juice feasting in my blog.

I have also taken time to talk to each of my family members to tell them how important this is for me because you see they enable me. All I had to say last time was I would go on a normal diet and they all said yes you can do that and it was like they gave me permission. I've told them when I feel like breaking I will come and tell someone and I have asked them to tell me to go to my room and have a rest/meditation etc until I feel more positive.

Succeeding this time on the juice feast will mean i finish just 3 days before my 39th birthday. Oh it would be so good to be under 100kg for the first time in 14 years.

Today I weighed 132.6kg thats 1 kg heavier then when I stopped juice feasting but is not bad all things considered. I will endeavour to not put on any weight between now and Friday.

Off to listen to more David Rainoshek and Mike adams in the secrets of Juice feasting. You can never have enough information.

2 comments:

Hanlie said...

I was so confused! The comment you left me has a link to an untitled blog, so you may want to change it in your blogger profile. Fortunately this post was in my reader and I put two and two together, genius that I am!

First of all, you're welcome! We need support on this journey and I'm happy to provide it. It is vitally important that we connect with other juice feasters and know that we're not going through the ups and downs of juice feasting alone.

Secondly, ban the word failure from your vocabulary. I have made so many false starts with detoxed in the past few years... The only reason I haven't fizzled out this time is because I have enormous on-line support, as well as the support from my husband.

Thirdly be prepared for the emotional aspect. Emotions are stored in the tissues, and with juice feasting we stir them up. Now is the time to finally deal with them, where previously we stuffed them with food. Get reading material related to emotional healing. Brandon Bays (The Journey) and Louise L. Hay (You Can Heal Your Life) are good choices. I am reading about EFT, emotional freedom technique at the moment.

Finally, know what you are aiming to achieve. Losing weight is just part of it. You should see Juice Feasting as a way of leaving behind your old lifestyle and starting a new lifestyle. Pursue health and weight loss will come!

You can do it! Some days are hard, but cry, sleep, howl, punch a cussion if you must. Just don't take any of your anger and frustration out on yourself. Now, more than ever, is the time to be kind to yourself. When you bodybrush, look at yourself in the mirror and bless and thank every part of your body. Fall in love with your body. I have and my body is responding beautifully!

You CAN heal your life!

MARYYX said...

Hey there
I would like to encourage you to think of yourself as a beautiful person right now. AND - to pat yourself on the back for the juice feasting you have already done!

I have also wavered along the way - so really, it was encouraging to find a blog from someone else who is struggling.

Sometimes, I find that I also want my family to withold permission for me to get off the juicing - but in reality, I find this is passing off the responsibility for my choices to them. My husband, from past experience, has come on the strategy of just letting me do whatever I want - because he knows that I tend to try to put off the responsibility for my choices on him. Then if I don't like the results - I also will blame him for the results.

Currently, I am doing a Green Smoothie Feast, as I wait for my new juicer to arrive. As I have waffled back and forth between the juice feasting, and eating - my body has definitely been telling me that it prefers the juicing, and the raw foods.

Having been diagnosed with an eating disorder in the past - compulsive overeating - I feel it is important for me to not label myself good or bad, based on my eating, not to beat myself up if I make what I consider to be less than the best possible choice.

Also - as to the eating disorder - I think that the vast majority of women here in the US suffer from this in one way or the other. When hospitalized, I was told that anorexia, bulimia and compulsive overeating are all really the same thing: an eating disorder. It is just sort of a continuum. I understand that girls as young as 9 are being diagnosed with anorexia, because they have already bought into the unhealthy cultural focus on eating, and on unrealistic expectations for their bodies.

Anyway - you CAN regain your health. We are all going to do this TOGETHER.

Have a juicy day
Maryyx